It was my absolute favorite time of the year.
I still love the songs. I still love the story.
(and that it is so much more than a story...)
But this time of year is hard now.
I have to believe it will some day be fun again.
Someday.
Today, when the kids left, I went to bed, trying to get the day to go away.
Though the next six hours were a mishmash of sleep, tears and snot...
(lovely picture, I know... that comforter is sooo going to the laundromat this week...)
I didn't fall back on any of my old stand-by 'feel-better' measures...
I know they only worked temporarily anyway.
Feeling better temporarily isn't worth breaking the promises that I've made
when God has been so faithful to me with His promises over the last year.
I'm not against drinking alcohol from time to time... but not specifically with the purpose of forgetting that I am having a bad day. So I haven't touched it today.
I didn't call any old friends who would get me into trouble... which is what I did last year.
So while my Christmas this year has been a bit rougher, and a little less "fun"...
I know I'll come through it with fewer regrets than last year.
And that is including the massive amount of Chinese food I ate a bit ago...
So, I don't have any deep message to share.
No big miracles happened today.
Some days the blog is just about accountability...
and keeping track of the changes God is making in my life.
Hopefully one year soon, I'll be able to look back at this Christmas
and say, "Wow, life has really changed... I'm so glad I waited patiently for
the plan that God had for me... instead of continuing to try to make my own,
even when the waiting was difficult."
When you go through deep waters, I will be with you. When you go through rivers of difficulty, you will not drown. When you walk through the fire of oppression, you will not be burned up; the flames will not consume you. Isaiah 43:2
"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11
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